she reminds me of my ex. her heart completely exposed ( I think she may have been undead, caus she had blood and guts all over the place. that's actually why we broke up, way to many stained shirts.) In addition she also had my balls in her hand.
no it was awful. I hated the way she bossed me. "do this, clean that" constantly. and on top of all that she ruined all of my good shirts with her blood and guts. I would hug her and get a liver stuck to my belt buckle.(I won't even go in to our sex life, but lets just say it was like she was on her period all the time.)and that's why I don't pick up girls in evil science labs any more.
This was my favorite comment as I am divorcing my wife of 13 years just after I found out she was entertaining her billiards instructor, cleaning out my bank account and locking me out of my home. Along with preventing me from possessing my firearms for the next year.
Why is she afraid is beyond me, I have always supported, her while she stayed at home volunteering her services.
wow, that sounds horrible, and I empathize. so after much deliberation I have devised a plan.
First thing, we must create a Giant Target made of wood. On the target will be hand and feet shackles.
Ok, so I saw a Jenna Jamison movie, and in it she shoots billiard balls out of her pussy at a fellow zombie. Now I am not %100 sure about this, but I think she must be undead to preform this feat. I propose we invite my ex-girlfriend over for a few drinks, wile I distract her you get a sample of her body fluid (this will be easy because her insides are spewing all over the place a majority of the time). After we obtain the virus we will then infect Jenna with the zombie virus after you seduce her.
We will then invite your ex and this "magic 8 ball guy" for a game of pool. At the party I will distract your wife, wile you present the now undead Jenna to your ex's new coke-head boyfriend. Zombie Jenna will then shoot all the billiard balls out of her vagina wile you and the pool wiz watch. Jenna's true mastery of billiards will impress, and provoke the coke-head to attempt sex with her. She will respond by eating him alive wile you watch.
Afterward I will console your ex-wife in order to gain her trust. After time passes, one night after having one too many glasses of Marlow I will take advantage of her physically by a fire place. Unbeknown to her, before our night of passion I will have infected myself with the zombie virus.
Wile she is still asleep, before she and I become zombies we will shackle her to the target, and put her in a convenient location for you. This way you will be able to throw darts at her face (and not just a photo of her face). All I ask in return is that you take care of my undead self, just chain me to the wall and feed me chunks of your dead ex-wife.
Tell me when we will get started. Your friend, J0E Grand
Oh Joe, what a great plan,I don't want to mess with the celebration of the holy child, so probably some time after Christmas.
I did not realize Jenna could shoot billiard balls, in the Philippines I saw a gal shoot ping pong balls accross the room. Which I think might be easier because of weight and storage considerations. Also, she could pick up a stack of quarters off the bar, which was great for making change for the hire of Jeepneys(public transport there).